The Miriam in this story is a mix of real conversations with women like you during our Shabbat program.
The Shabbat Weight Gain Saga: How One Woman Conquered Her Challenging Relationship with Food (and Family)
Scene: A cozy coaching session with Lily, me, and my lovely client, Miriam, from our Shabbat group coaching program, who’s here to discuss her Shabbat struggle.
Miriam: [sighs, laughing] "Lily, I think Shabbat is conspiring against me. Every week, I tell myself, ‘This time I’ll keep my cool,’ but by the time Kiddush is starting, my kids are already arguing, annoying each other over who sits where, and I’m ready to stress-eat the entire challah!"
Me: "Oh, Miriam, you’re not alone. Shabbat weight gain isn’t just about the food but the whole environment! Between the kids, the noise, and the endless chaos, no wonder we end up overindulging just to cope."
Miriam: "Exactly! I feel like all the family stress and noise around the table just push me to eat more than I want. By the time we’re done with lunch, I’m ready to barricade myself with a plate of cookies and a glass of wine."
Me "Let’s change that story. With a few grounding techniques and some simple meal setup changes, we can make Shabbat a lot less stressful—and a lot less tempting for stress-eating. Imagine leaving the table feeling calm, connected, and even… lighter?"
Miriam. [smiling skeptically] "That would be a miracle. But I’m willing to try!"
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We started with two key strategies: grounding techniques to help Miriam stay calm and intentional and environmental changes to reshape her Shabbat meal setup. The results? Life-changing!
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Week 1: The Buffet and Veggies Plan
Instead of every dish sitting right in front of her like a smorgasbord, Miriam tried a buffet-style setup. She set all the food on a side table, so she and her family had to get up if they wanted seconds. Plus, we made sure her spread included more vegetables—beautifully plated salads, roasted veggies, and lighter options that didn’t feel like “diet food” but gave her healthier choices.
Miriam:[excitedly] "Lily, the buffet was a game-changer! I wasn’t reaching for more cookies or schnitzel just because they were sitting right in front of me. And the extra veggies? They filled me up so I wasn’t immediately craving more heavy stuff."
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Week 2: The Gratitude Shift
Next, we tackled the stress. Instead of jumping straight into Kiddush with everyone talking over each other, moving around, and annoying her husband, I suggested she take a quiet moment right before they sit down to think of one thing she loves about each person at the table. It was a small shift, but she felt more patient and less reactive to her kids' usual squabbles by focusing on gratitude.
Miriam: "Lily, it was amazing! Thinking about what I love about each person helped me stay calm. When the kids started arguing over seats, instead of snapping, I just reminded myself of why I love them—and it worked! I felt so much more peaceful."
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Week 3: Less Confrontation, Less Impulsive Eating
With grounding techniques and a new meal plan in place, Miriam noticed something incredible—she was less reactive with her kids. She wasn’t diving into challah to calm her nerves, and her patience with her kids had grown noticeably. By starting the meal with gratitude, she felt more connected and less drawn to reach for sweets or more food just to keep herself busy.
Results: The Shabbat Shift
By the end of Week 4, Miriam was thrilled with the changes. Instead of feeling heavy and sluggish on Sunday morning, she felt lighter, more rested, and (dare I say it?) even excited for the week ahead. And the best part? That weight gain she used to carry into Monday? It was now mostly gone by the start of the week.
Miriam: "Lily, I feel like a different person. I’m not obsessing over food, I’m not fighting with my kids every five minutes, and I’m actually looking forward to Shabbat! And my husband and I have even started taking a walk together after lunch. Who knew a few tweaks could make such a difference?"
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The Takeaway
Miriam’s story shows how a few small, strategic changes can make Shabbat feel less like a battleground and more like the peaceful, restorative day it’s meant to be. With a buffet setup, grounding techniques, and a focus on gratitude, she not only gained control over her eating but also brought more harmony to her family life.
If you find yourself struggling with Shabbat weight gain, remember—you don’t have to do it all at once. Small changes can make a big difference. And if you need help, the Thrive Well Shabbat Blueprint is here to support you every step of the way. 🌸
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